What's it gonna be the, eh?

2009-12-08T20:57:00.003-06:00

I will create a wall. On it will be all that is and will be until we rewrite the present and future. My failures, your failures, our fathers'...will all be open to scrutiny.

You may never again rely on what you know. From now on, it will all be a reality check that does not include your understanding.

My forefather was abandoned in his age and this led on and on again. I cannot accept and I cannot deny. Reality and her ancestors are hungry and we cannot deny them.

But to know yourself, as they say, is to know thine own enemy. Inside it looks like outside and we all can attest to the fact that we wish no more of that.

So pent-up and post-modern I will carry on into the vast fathomless reaches of the soul. Knowing that not knowing is the end. Crushing and fading beyond the sight of the mortal, this truth will remain and remind.

When forever comes crashing, I will hear nothing. I will be a void in the vast universe, knowing only that I was for a brief moment, matter, organized and self-aware, devoid of desire until then.

No child left behind...?

2008-06-06T11:14:00.003-05:00

I had to post this someplace, as it is just too good. I've had my freshmen (that's 9 years of previous educational experience before arriving on my doorstep) for the entire year. We've developed a "Freshman Academy" at the high school to really focus on essential skill development, maturity, responsibility, and scholarship. For our part we've used dozens of innovative instructional techniques, in-class reading and writing enrichments, extra help sessions, leniency for missing/late assignments, group conferences, hundreds of phone calls and letters to guardians, meetings, conferences, workshops...You name it, we've been trying it.

Well at the end of the year are finals...I choose 5 open-ended creative thinking questions for the students to answer in several paragraphs. The students have their choice of any 2 of the prompts. Expecting the worst, usually doesn't leave you disappointed when the worst arrives...right?

Here are some of the results of "Freshman Academy" excellence. I've included all the grammatical/syntax errors.

Prompt #1
You have been hired as a biologist to study a rare species of bird that lives in the Amazon rain forest. Not much is known about the ecology of this bird. Provide details about how you would study this bird in order to determine how it is connected with other animals and plants in its ecosystem. Please use proper terms to describe what interactions and roles you would try to study and what types of information you would hope to discover about this bird.

Great answer #1
"To find out how it connects to other birds? there physical enviroment is soil, water, climate, and ect....Many birds could be found in a pine forests is hawks, warblers, and sparrows. Bids know where there kinds are in forest the connect by peaking at eachother. Sometimes they are different peakng sounds fur danger. When birds lay eggs they are not to be touched at all. Birds are really careful on eggs because if there touched they are miss treated or are killed by there own parents. Birds also are not really found in winter they travel until they get to there right Climate if the winds blowing there way they go opposite of it. You would need to discover what they eat and how they are around climates."

Great answer #2
"I would study this bird very slow and carefully. I would take DNA and run some tests. Also use old animal trees to see where it ends. Then, i would take the bird and see where it would fit. Next, i would determine what year it had arised. Finally, i would write down my hypothesis, cause i figured out what i needed to know when it emerged, its DNA, its relation to other animals, and its cause of being rare."

Great answer #3
"To see how a bird that lives in the Amazon Forest i would take the bird and try to find the similarites of body structures with other animals or plants i would check to see whhat body figures are the same I would hope to discover that the Amazon bird would be realitive to humans more than animals."

Prompt #2
You have discovered and new fossil in the shale cliffs of Wyoming. Detail how you would study the fossil to determine its origins. Point to how you would look for evidence in the fossil, modern animals, the mountains where you found the fossil, or other known fossils to prove its origins. Include the methods you might use to determine the age of the fossil.

Great answer #1
"How I would study the fossil is look at all these fossil books to find the Fossil. Then the place I would fin the fossil is where no one has ever been at untill a couple days ago. The place where I found the fossil is at a lake in Wyoming. I known it is a fish that lives in that lake. I bet the fossil was about 2.5 million years old & it has been at that lake for about .5 million years; so it must of got moved to a different lake."

Great answer #2
"hello, I am going to tell you how to find thhe origins of this fossil. One way you can determine how old the fossil is. is by looking at how old the fossil is. To do this, you should compare the fossil with another one to determine how old it is."

Great answer #3
"you can look if the bird has simular features like the beak or the wings. or compare the two enviorments like the plants or animals that the bird eats. The bones of the birds like the head. The simular features of this bird may lead to finding ancestors of this animals which could tell us how it migrated from where ever it was to Wyoming."

Great answer #4
"How I would stued the fossil is by compering it to then fossils. I would comper the bones. I would see what lived there were we found it."

Ahh...I love it.

Good stuff. Psychologist say that a child's capacity for learning develops by the age of six. That means that by the time they are 15 years old and sitting at a table in my classroom, they've been building on their capacity for all nine of the previous years in classrooms and schools just like mine. Makes me wonder just what mom and dad did for those first six years? Because, I sure as hell know what all the schools and professional educators have been doing. Better yet, what the hell are mommy and daddy doing now with these kids between the hours of 3 pm and 8 am the next day?

Clearly I'm failing at my task.

When is it...

2008-05-20T22:16:00.001-05:00

I forget how often I look at the world and cannot comprehend the beauty and pain I feel.

Everywhere. The grating, possesive movements of those who strive, desire, struggle, thwart, and stagnate against the backdrop of self and other...of world, mother, father, child, lover, enemy, friend, disease, hunger, sate, peril, safety, warmth, comfort, thirst, striving...a world of every pain and dream that humanity has to offer.

In all the ages of life...these dreams are shared and unspoken amongst humanity. The yearning, the knowledge, the resolve, the despair of our species. What is it in the grand scheme? Is it misplaced? Does a benevolent, yet removed, god smile down in curious wonder at the spectacle. Does that god breathe in and sigh at our realizations and question their own wisdom and comprehension of creation?

When we express this mystery...when we accept that we are not infinity...we are not the end of existence...when we see the beauty of that creation, yet accept its fleeting fragility...

is that salvation?

is that god?

with that, i am grateful for all of it. the pain. the suffering. the joy. the mystery. the shared paths. the realization of it all.

joyful participation in the suffering of life

when i die

2008-05-14T21:30:00.002-05:00

when i die...

I suppose you should post it in the paper...give everyone the once over. Long-lost girlfriends; people who forgot about me; grade school teachers; colleagues; relatives; ecstasy dealers...whomever.

First, I don't want to be buried...I've always feared being buried alive. Cremation...yeah, that works. My ashes belong in the rock (Sinissippi) river; in Black Hawk park; in the north cascades; or in Cades Cove in Smokey Mtn. National Park.

No headstone. Maybe near a remarkable tree.

We'll need several kegs and bottles. Rent a hall someplace. Don't care. No crap beer...Guinness, Goose Island, Rogue, etc...

No tears...or some, who cares. I'll want Al, Sarah, Rob, Devin, Chad, Dad, etc... to choose some music. Metal, Irish, Baroque, old school hip hop, electronica, folk, blues...

Most of all, I'll need some bands to play a few songs. My life insurance isn't much, but I would like Hope and Suicide to play, they can play H+S songs and bloodlet...(CPAI-75)...Anthrofuge could play some of their songs, and some Uphold songs.

I want people to drink, listen, have fun...

I want people to think about changing their lives.

I want people to think about overthrowing the government..rearranging their ideals...starting community farms...assisting in neighborhood coops...walking to work.

Last of all...cooper should be taken care of, walked off the leash every day, chase deer, dig in the soil...He should be fed chickens.

Peace.

Why can't I

2008-03-27T01:35:00.002-05:00

"Go, repress your prudent side
It's beautiful but plastic
Go, reveal darker sides
Killing is never too drastic

Go, turn to the assassin
Go, make an appointment with the assassin..."

~Junip

It seems like everyone fits into some sort of mold...Every second of every day...trudging through the same steps, traipsing into a mold. Predescribed.

A trance.

2 a.m. is like 2 p.m....as I stare at the same things as everyday. Waiting for happiness to fall from the sky...how pointless.

Like the only meaning is in conflict.

Like humans were ever meant to be happy.

Like we come with the program that enables us to defeat ourselves.

Just when the smallest measure of success peaks, our spirit rebels and the body arcs away from the hand that offers sympathy.

We are never happy...never satisfied; always moving into nothing.

Ghosts

2008-03-12T22:46:00.002-05:00

I don't know how to describe what happened to me this evening...but I will try.

Cooper (the wolfdog, if'n you've read me before) and I often go out to Black Hawk Park, to wander the 200+ acres of upland mesic forests, in which I've spent most of my outdoor days during my youth.

Tonight, as we strayed off-trail, and he paralleled a ridge, I saw two ghosts. They were about 12-14 inches at the shoulder and they were 80 feet to my right. Fluffly gray fur, pointy ears, a black saddle on the hackles. They looked very unlike most canids I was used to seeing.

Cooper was on the scent of something about 200 feet to my left. The two gray doglike animals stopped and watched me. They were traveling together, one about 8 feet in front of the other. Cooper kept ahead of all of us.

When Cooper finally turned and ran back towards me, he saw them. But before this, they had glimpsed him running away from them...at this, they perked up. Their ears were up, their tails out, their smiles apparent. They trotted 20 feet towards him, as he ran away...obviously chasing him. They were not territorial; they were not aggressive...they were interested. It almost seemed as if they wanted to greet him...they seemed lonely...searching...maybe for a parent? Alpha?

Instantly, I was struck by the puppy-nature of these two canids. I thought "coyotes?" Then I thought that this was pretty early for two coyote pups (at about 1/2 size of adult) to be wandering on their own. Plus, their ears were shorter and their fur was a bit shorter than coyote. Two thoughts passed briefly: wolf pups...domestics?...Yet they definitely didn't trot along like domestics...plus, what breed? And, wolf pups? We'd had a few run ins with wolves in northern Illinois in the past 3 years.

As Cooper turned to check on my status, as he always does on walks, he spied the two small animals. He bolted towards them, hackles and tail raised. I panicked...Cooper had caught wild animals before...and it always ended in scars and death...My mind raced to rabbits, raccoons, possums, and groundhogs...all of which seemed fiercer than these two inquisitive animals. "95 lb wolfdog meets baby coyotes in park" seemed an adequate headline.

When the impending doom descended upon them, they ran. However, not very fast. It was like they weren't sure if Cooper was serious. He was.

Good thing these animals were small and agile...and maybe a bit naive. All I could think of was having to dispatch some poor pup after the wolfdog had given it a good shaking or two.

However, the furthest from us was the one being chased. It ran over hill and dale, through undergrowth, under logs, and deadfalls, over thorn and shrub. Cooper chased it for about a quarter mile, about 5 feet from its tail. Neither made a sound. The second little gray animal, chased about 5 feet behind Cooper. It was one of the most comical things I've ever seen. Back and forth, with a stupid human following about 200 feet back.

Finally they hit a ridge, and outdistance Cooper through some thick brush.

I didn't see them again.

Tomorrow, I will go out at dusk with a pack, camera, flashlight, a flask, and water. I will leave the last part of my deer carcass in the woods. I will wait for them.

I will wait for the last and latest bit of wild to bless my little city.

I might even weep a bit at the loss of wild.

from whence came hatred

2008-03-04T21:06:00.002-06:00

I love to post negative rants and raves. I would love to try to put a positive spin on everything, look for the silver lining...but, it is just too hard. I will leave that to people with more time on their hands.

On the day that the war was being voted on in congress approximately 5 years ago, I hung my head. After 9/11 with the atrocities of that day still fresh in their minds and the rhetoric of our newest dictator in their hearts, Americans were quick to jump into the fray and kick some ass. With lies as weapons, little did they know that years down the road we would still be fighting what was no longer a war against perceived terror, but a riotous occupation in the midst of sectarian struggle for power. The little-thinking, yet all knowing public, fed a steady diet of mass media slowly began to regret its 2003 fervor for the war in Iraq.

I was in high school during the first gulf war, and at that time was called to the principal's office along with a few others for constantly wearing a black arm band in protest. Nothing came of it, as our illustrious 'pal was staring into the eyes of 3 of the top 10 students in the junior class, who were also heavily involved in the performing arts, club presidents, and teacher's kids. He just wanted to express to us that what we were doing was pretty unpopular.

As I fast-forward to 2008 and reflect back on my moods at the start of our Middle East incursions, I realize more than ever why I am against this act of war. Besides the lies and cloudy motivations...besides the obvious posturing and positioning for the last of the world's oil to bolster a stagnant economy and pad the pockets of the military/industrial elite...besides the bravado...besides the obvious Judaeo-Christian belief of ownership and control of the Middle East...there is the reality of the horror and inhumanity of war. What it does to the collective psyche...what it does to the humanity of those involved and those who bear witness.

Without linking or specific mention...the media (internet mainly) are latching onto stories of soldiers who during the course of this war have been irrevocably damaged both physically and psychologically. Soldiers who engage in rape, torture, animal cruelty, wanton unprovoked violence. These men and women have lost a part of their humanity that renders them rational, sane, and feeling. Why is it that the government refuses or delays the treatment of mental illness in soldier who have just come from a war zone? Why is it that benefits for soldiers are denied ans questioned by those who used these soldiers as cheap cannon-fodder? Why is it that the great military hospitals that should care for those who "protect our freedom" are plagued by incompetence and shortcuts?

What about the lives of the innocent bystanders and citizens of this ordeal. Well over 100,000 non-combatant Iraqis killed in 5 years...more than 2,000,000 displaced Iraqi refugees. Children with no parents. Children emotionally and physically scarred in unimaginable ways. Women without husband and entire families to help support them in their traditionally patriarchal society. The sick and elderly left to die from want and neglect as the infrastructure of Iraq is destroyed around them and governments are bled dry of money by thievery...explicit or veiled.

The horror of war damages all of humanity, our collective spirit. It produces in us a thirst for rage. It promote, not compassion, but revulsion for the differences that make the human race so dynamically beautiful. I remember this after a friend of mine returned for the 2nd time from the war and with a nervous air said "...it's great. Where else would they give me a weapon and pay me to violate essentially every human right and get away with it."

I speak from experience...not personal...but through the testimony of friends and family. I have seen family and friends deployed and come back to tell their stories. I've known others who have not come back. My grandfather fought in WWII, was wounded, and came home to father 4 children and tell his tale. He felt that he was fighting a for a noble cause against the impending doom embodied by the Nazis of Germany. He was willing to give his life for what he called "love of family, life, and liberty..."

I compare this to the ignobility of what our generation's war has become. A souless, pointless grab at the last ditches of a dying way of life under the auspices of fighting for the freedom of Americans. A war against terror. A president who the day after the greatest violent loss of life on American soil, implores his subjects to go out and shop. I remembered this as we approached the 76th anniversary of the FDR's inauguration speech in 1932 when he proclaimed that the "only thing we have to fear is fear itself." There was man of the people, a true non-partisan who fought tooth and nail for freedom and the betterment of the spirit of America. The spirit of reverence for all...for equality...for the common person...for the common value of all life.

Stevie

2008-03-02T22:34:00.003-06:00

When I was in college...Had a boa constrictor named Stevie...that was for Stevie Wonder...Odd.

I forgot how much S.W. I listened to, as a youth. My sister and I had a Stevie Wonder tape with a bunch of his songs on it. We used to jam out to it on my jambox. I am so fortunate to have had a father that was a musician all his life. From the time I was 4 years old, I was listening to music that most people still haven't heard more than in passing. My father had a record collection that we would regularly sit and listen to on Sat. mornings: Brahms, Coltrane, Brubeck, Bach, Debussy, Schubert, Telemann, Souza, Copland, Tchaikovsky, Miles Davis, Beethoven, Handel...I don't think I can type them all.

I am grateful.

I found this Stevie clip on youtube today.

Struggle buggle

2008-02-28T18:27:00.003-06:00

So, I've been struggling under the perceived need to "move my educational apparatus" into the web 2.0 era.

I joined twitter recently (cbutterfield) wikispaces (cbutterfield and qcnags) got my edublog up, skype (again)...what's next.

I recently saw will richardson (google him) at our school. We paid him $2500 for two hours to talk to 150 or so people about how great having a "global classroom" was and how it freed up the students from having to be constrained by four walls. He also spoke about how the ways in which we ask them to communicate were not the ways they used in real life. In RL he explained, they text their friend and have my space. Well, that's true. But what do those skills garner them? I mean, there is very little knowledge gained from being able to comment on/seeing myspace pics of your friends half-naked at the last kegger...social skills aside.

I wonder as america slides into a recession and the preliminary effects of peak oil, along with the further isolation from the global community because of our imperialist dogma/actions (which will hamstring many aspects of our culture), how global communication skills and web savvy will serve our students...? What will happen to those who simply have never developed a work ethic that demands attention and focus on things that are not immediately (if ever) gratifying...? What will happen to half-literate people who can barely communicate on a face to face basis or take instruction and devote simple instruction to memory? What about "learners" who possess no work ethic or perseverance in tasks that bore them or are just plain hard (the years I spent roofing, in a foundry, washing dishes, hauling trash, etc... come to mind)?

Will the lack of "four walls" or the presence of them help?

NEways

Been listening to Zero 7 lately.

Time to go...

2008-02-22T12:02:00.004-06:00

Well, I've decided it is time to get my backside in order and start the old blog again. I like to read, I just don't like to write...lately.

So here's to a new post!

I am going to try to focus this blog into a more positive commentary on personal, social, political, and professional life.

We'll see.

Meanwhile, I've been enjoying dailycoyote. Great blog. Look for it.

Cooper's Second Year

2007-05-30T21:29:00.000-05:00

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Currently Listening
Christmas
By Old Man Gloom
see related

A celebration of Cooper's 2nd year of life. Happy Birthday, we love you buddy.

10:28 PM -

Top 10 albums

2006-05-26T19:29:00.000-05:00

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Currently Listening
Entheogen
By Bloodlet
see related

Changed

Albums that changed me:
1) Entheogen--by Bloodlet
Time signatures that were all over the boards, a brutal guitar, fretless bass, and, of course, Scott Angelacos' vocals.

2) RUN DMC--by RUN DMC
Break beats and hardcore raps...1983 was real ya'll. I will never forget getting this tape in the mall and listening to it for 1 week straight. Where's my cardboard?

3) Virgil Fox: Live at the Filmore East--by virgil Fox (and J.S. Bach)
Fugue in A-minor is the toughest piece ever written for organ...and Virgil plays like a giant. Sweeping counterpoint and logical returns...this the piece that horror-dreams are made of. This made me realize that something complex, dark, deep, and cavernous could be made of spirit and rhythm.

4) Kind of Blue--by Miles Davis
Seems Cliche', but 'tis not. I was listening to Miles before I knew I was listening to Miles. The easy roots of be-bop flow through "So What" put a profound bent on my life and anything I've done musically.

5) The IVth Crusade--by Bolt Thrower
This was the first album that made me realize there was something heavier out there. Something that ruled and skulked at the edges of the fire...waiting...something methodical. Something diabolical.

6) ATLiens--by Outkast
The simple, yet complex, yet down to earth flow of Outkast had matured on their 2nd album. I couldn't believe the laid-back flows and the inspired, out-of-this-world lyrics. Enlightenment and hip-hop combined, made the perfect southern spiel.

7) Master of Puppets--by Metallica
Dark, deep, and haunting. I discovered this album after my 1987 awakening to metal, as I will call it. Muscianship and sheer writing ability made this album a monumental work to the art of storytelling in metal. Brash guitars, melodic and detructive...cadenced with the thrum of the fretless bass. ahhhhhhh

8) Feeling Older Faster--by Threadbare
The deep sychopy and lustre of this album are second to none. No other hardcore band has developed such a deep understanding of psyche and motivation. They gave nothing away, yet shared their hearts with everyone who listened. The rhythmic bass, intertwining drums, and lost vocals pave a pathway into the innerworkings of the soul.

9) Temple of the Morning Star--by Today is the Day
I first saw them live in Athens, GA at a biker bar in 1993. This was the moment I realized the shear brutality of the human spirit. The fact that this man could put into music and words the suffering of generations, bent my soul

10) The Unreal Never Lived--by YOB
Density, heaviness, and undying doom. This album introduced me to the ability of intruments to convey the deepest longing and despair of the human soul. Countless eons pass as these songs resonate and pulse through my ears. Never has hope stood so little a chance as when this super-group began to compose.

2006-05-09T22:30:00.000-05:00

Currently Listening
Youth
By Matisyahu
see related

Several things tonight...

1) I grow increasingly tired of humanity...I will cite two examples for your enjoyment.
Yesterday, I get home from a long day at work. I enjoy a cold beverage and then take my dog out to the canal for some recreation and exercise. As usual, I find the assorted bevy of beer cans, bottles, styrofoam containers, plastic bags, discarded tackle, etc...Now, this is ALL NEW stuff since last time I was out there 1 week ago. Here are a bunch of fishermen/women that "enjoy" the outdoors and nature and peace and quiet...yet they cannot put two and two together and figure out how the f*ck to discard their trash or recycle it...like it is just too much of a burden to carry the same cans (now empty) back to their trucks at the end of the day. Hmmm...next time I see you I shall plant that litter up your ass.

2) I attend my honorable father's retirement concert (he directs a community band and is at the end of a 43 year career teaching music) and am on my way home. I need gasoline and decide to hit up the citgo on 30th in Rock Island. As I walk in to pay, this drunk 50yr old ass walks in with his friend/escort. The first thing he does is asks "who drives that cadillac?" A black gentlemen next to me, says "I do." White trash man then proceeds to recite a string of expletives and then asks the gentleman "don't you know how to park...what the f*ck is wrong with you...?" To which the black gentleman replies..."I'm sorry, I was just running in and didn't see the yellow lines..." Now that is a legit excuse, because the lines are hardly visible and this man's parking job didn't interfere with anything. After that man leaves...the white trash warrior begins talking to anyone who will listen (which is me...) He asks me every question in the book including what I think about the "nigger's" parking job and why am I buying rolling papers? I tell him to drop it and leave me alone. At that he tells me that I am a pussy and I drive a piece of sh*t car (I will give him that, b/c it is fall-apart blazer). I tell him to drop it again, because I do this for a living...to which he looks astounded and says "whu..."

So I go out to my car. He exits shortly and keeps questioning/berating me. Finally he asks me if I am "going to side with the niggers..." To which I respond "yes."

He then tells me I am pussy and I should come over to him and do something. I tell him to walk it to his car and drive on...which he does...

Now...all the while, I realize this man is a poor, blue collar (nothing wrong with that...), slob who's had a few too many (way too many). He really isn't a threat...he is drunk, but not driving...(he has a mortified friend with him who left the building at the start of the harrassment and sat in the car...)...I know that in 5 seconds I could drop him flat with little effort (I'm also tucking the black stainless steel ASP tactical baton in my waistband under the shirt...YUH!).

But it just isn't worth it...

All he deserves is a little sobriety and some sleepytime...

I'm tired of it all. I am tired of the wakeless masses that trudge through their day without thinking of anything but their shitty little needs at that time and what they need to "just get by..." I am tired of people who don't realize where their livings, their lives, their needs come from...

I am tired of people who notice little and act less.

Happy 1st Birthday Cooper

2006-04-24T22:05:00.000-05:00

Monday, April 24, 2006

Currently Listening
Trampled Under Hoof
By Goatsnake
see related

Happy Birthday, Cooper

I never wanted a dog...All my life I've owned reptiles and various sundry small animals...

One day, I talked myself and my wife into this mutt...this LabWolf-a-Mute.

That is very Zen...it seemed like the right thing to do at the time...we took him home from a farm in Taylor Ridge, Illinois. The following days, weeks, and months were a struggle...but if ever you choose in the moment to pursue a path, then there is no other choice but to pursue 100%, all else is futile and irresponsible.

So happy birthday, Cooper...you bastard, half-wolf, half-breed. I love you.

Patriot

2006-04-15T20:26:00.000-05:00

There has been much talk of late of immigration reform in the US. I find it interesting to ponder the motivations of the Bush administration as they clamour for a position that puts them in favour of the people they are trying to help as well as the favour of the people that are their constituency.

I have been asked what I think.

I suppose as any nation, borders are really arbitrary as they are only a means to control the capital of the nation and, somewhat, its defense. Without borders, it would be easy to lose track of capital, patriots, property, and criminals. Now, mind you, I don't think our current policies have done a bang up job of preventing any of these things.

For example, NAFTA, which was passed a little more than a decade ago. This allowed increased expansion of the imperial corporate interests of US-based industry. It did little (as was supremely touted at the time) to improve the lives of Americans (look at what has happened in Illinois and Iowa with Maytag corporation exporting entire manufacturing facilities and costings us 1000's of jobs...meanwhile the US textiel industries have shipped 296,000 jobs to Mexico). Nor, has NAFTA done anything to improve the lives of Mexicans who get these jobs, as they are mistreated, receive no healthcare or retirement, and are paid only subsitence wages...all-the-while their lives and natural resources are threatened because comprador leadership allows big corporations to do as they will, with the promise and expectation of payoffs.

Meanwhile the Department of Homeland Defense has done little in inspired confidence. Everything from shaking down old ladies at airports to actually allowing would-be bombmakers onto planes and through our borders with Canada. In a study of 21 US airports, last month, federal agents were successful in smuggling bomb-making materials through security checkpoints at all 21 airports.

SAD

The real argument at stake with immigration reform is the control and treatment of those who come here (mostly Mexicans). True they are vital to our economy and our workforce, but, as undocumented workers they are taking advantage of our system of employment and our tax structure. Are they "stealing" jobs from Americans...hard to say. Perhaps.

That said, I've had the pleasure of knowing dozens of upstanding and contributive immigrants to our nation. I would like to think that all of them are and will be great patriots to this nation: struggling to make the dream come true, trying to better themselves and their communities, working to improve the system and fight against injustice. I fear that is not always the case. There are inumerable examples of immigrants that milk the system, shun integration, and make their communites worse. Of course, they are doing no worse than the native citizens that inhabit these roles.

If a hard working perons, native or immigrant, wishes to stay and work and live and love in our country, then they should be allowed to so so, if they follow the accepted procedures.

Meanwhile, as a balance, I suggest moving all the non-participant, complaining, wasteful, apathetic, abusive, criminal, and abandoning persons (native or not) off of our shores. GTFO! I am tired of those who live life without thinking, without moral recourse, and without contribution to our world. Those who take and take and take and do nothing for society, nature, or mankind other than breathe our air.

Love them, but if they fail, leave them behind.

“There are three kinds of patriots, two bad, one good. The bad ones are the uncritical lovers and the loveless critics. Good patriots carry on a lover's quarrel with their country, a reflection of God's lover's quarrel with all the world.”

~Rev. William Sloane Coffin

Too far.

2006-02-12T08:25:00.000-06:00

Currently Listening
The Further Adventures of Lord Quas
By Quasimoto
see related

I told ya

As to my previous entry. I found this entertaining. Too bad we live in a culture where you have to put up with this scheit. Public canings would go a long way.

On another note. Cue the music...

After last week's amazing revelation by our commander in chief that we are a nation addicted to oil, I have decided to add a few comments to the gems that issued from his pie hole.

1) We are addicted to oil on purpose. This has not been an accident. In fact, efforts to reduce our dependence on oil are ALWAYS strongly criticized by the oil giants. They hold above our heads the spectre of economic woe, lost jobs, and financial ruin, whenever talk of cutting oil imports, refining slowdowns, and such bugaboos as "increased fuel economy" finds its way onto the table.

Jimmy Carter passed a bill in his first year of office that would have brought a nationwide 23-26 mpg required fuel economy for consumer vehicles by the year 1985. The office of the president admited that car manufacturers would have to tighten their belts and change production, but the American public would respond.

Reagan shut this down his first year in office. With that freedom, the car manufacturers went back to their old ways, and left with little choice, the American public was back to using cars and trucks that averaged well below 20 mpg.

2) In 2005, a new energy act was passed. This act contained over $7,000,000,000 in tax cuts and subsidies for large oil and coal industries. That same act contained a mere $198,000,000 for frontier energy research and development (think solar, fuel cells, etc...)
That means we are spending 2.7 cents on renewable energy for every dollar we spend on oil.

What is more intersting, is that the total subsidies and tax breaks for fossil fuel companies has been almost 90 billion dollars in the past 5 years.

Does that sound like a regime that is trying to kick the habit of oil???

3) Roughly 50% of our oil imports go to fuel production. The other 50% go into the manufacturing of chemicals, synthetics, plastics, fertilizers, pesticides, herbicides, and building materials. That means not only is our transportation industry addicted to oil, so is every other facet of our business world. Powerful lobbyists for the farm industry have shut down proposed cuts in the federal budget that would have reduced the "aid" going to farms.

American farming is some of the most productive, yet irresponsibly wasteful agriculture on the planet. Last years budget contained almost $19.7 billion for agriculture. We are paying business to farm and we are paying them not to farm. We are paying them to waste and to keep using the same unsustainable farming practices we've been using since the 1970's. Addicted to oil, indeed. Our farming industries are wholly dependent on oil.

Why not put money into community farms, that are small scale, human labor intensive (rather than machine/chemical/oil intensive) and use organic methods? Why not, because as with the oil industry, big farming is big business and backed by powerful lobbying groups.

4) All in all what you see and hear is lip service. Americans are going to keep using oil and other wasteful energies at will, until the federal government provides a system of wholesale reform.

BECAUSE of that, Americans must do this on their own. Walk more, drive less. Eat locally grown foods, budget for sustainable energy use, and reduce your consumption of coal, gas, electric, and oil. Use fewer chemicals. Use fewer personal care products. Take shorter showers. Spend more time reading, less time in front of the TV. Patronize businesses that are locally owned, rather than saving a buck or two at Wal-Mart. Support buisnesses that are socially and ethically minded, rather than money minded.

If you can, move out. Move into the country on a couple of acres. Not one of those new suburbian ready-made homes, but an old one. Grow some food. Put up a wind turbine, some solar panels. Catch rain water, build a solar still, compost your food scraps, get some chickens, dig a root cellar, brew beer, distill spirits, and ferment wine, raise bees for honey, get a gun and wait for the collapse.

at all costs

2006-01-16T10:25:00.000-06:00

Currently Listening
Oceanic
By Isis
see related

Here we go again...(zany laughter...)

War in perpetuum.

I love the USA and its wonderful people.

I love their hypocracy.

What in the world gives us the GD right to exploit 60 years of nuclear technology, then tell Iran (or ANYONE else for that matter) that they cannot develop nuclear ENERGY!? In the first 50 years of the nuclear age, the United States conducted 1045 nuclear tests. That is 1045 separate nuclear explosions: underground, in the atmosphere, above the water, below the water, in space. We are the only nation to have ever used a nuclear bomb as a weapon, killing more than 75,000 japanese and destroying homes, lives, jobs, land for millions more.

France, Great Britain, China, India, Pakistan, Russia, Israel, and the USA.

All nations with nuclear bombs and nuclear power. Why aren't we invading them? What about North Korea? It is working on a nuclear weapons program now.

The answers for what you seek lie in the failed politics of oil, imperialism, and "terror." Our government must make examples of all the little nations that refuse to play ball with us. We know that Saddam was planning to begin selling oil in Euros rather than dollars. That was as early as the fall of 2000. Guess who was onboard?...Iran. That's right, Iraq's ancient enemy, turned common friend against a common international bully, the USA.

See this article by William Clark.

In the 2005-2006 years, Iran develops, then carries out a real plan to begin to trade oil in Euros on the European market. Given our staggering international debt (much of it to European nations and China) this would be a crushing blow to our economy and our ability to compete. China's demand for oil, will outstrip ours in the next 3 decades. They are becoming the most powerful nation (economically great potential) and the only way we can hold our position is by fear, terror, propaganda, and ultimately war.

Scholars and anti-imperial cognoscenti, with a distaste for our saber rattling and warmongering have been talking about this for almost 2 years. Iran will be the next target...it just takes time to develop likely story and sell it to the US public and the fearful, rich, enthroned congress and senate...who of course, are more than willing to bow to political pressure from the reactionary, shallow-minded, superficial, undereducated Idiot-America. After all pleasing the people is tantamount to winning reelection and keeping all those ill-gotten gains, kickbacks, pork barrel projects and bribes.

Americans, don't buy the hype. Don't buy another war. This is about our imperialism. This is about a nation on the downhill...sliding away from what is right. A nation trying to keep its faltering hold on the world and its own sorry outdated point of view. If the USA had progressed in the 70's and 80's rather than heighten its dependence on fossil fuels, we would not be in this mess. Had we put billions of dollars into alternative energy, sustainable farming, a manufacturing base built on recycling RATHER than into lining the pockets of already wealthy industrialists and oil tycoons, we would not be in this mess.

Deny the lie.

"...once again back it's the incredible, rhyme animal, D, Public Enemy No. 1"

2005-12-14T21:49:00.000-06:00

What's it gonna be then, eh?

I must say, tis been a while since I've been round these parts. Then again, what does it matter, because nobody is reading these posts.

Updates:

Got married...

Got a dog...

Got a headache...

Got unstable...

That's right!...I had a stable, then I tore it down.

My newly 'in lawed family is swell. I love them much. Stephen, Billy-boy, Beth, Fritzie, Wally, Gary, Leslie, Denny, Ella, Evan, Madelyn, Melissa...all the gang. Much love and respect, JA! (all in a Bob Marley-esque tone of voice)

I cannot tell you all how different it is to be married...It is and then again it isn't. I love my wife, that hasn't changed...but it IS different. You fell like you've been a boat for a few years, but now the boat is out to sea, and you'd better steer, and paddle, and navigate, and swab the decks, etc...OR ELSE! More commitment...I suppose. The gravity of the relationship sinks (d'oh) in.

Any whooo. It's good to be here. I will try to stay a bit more...current. I am inspired by my bro, Stephen and his posting quality.

To place myself...?

2005-03-22T22:33:00.000-06:00

Currently Playing
Solarized
By Ian Brown
see related

What is the definition of human ecology? What is the meaning of determination and interaction and connection?

Or, in other words, what is the humanistic meaning of the Grand Unifying Theory (if it in fact exists...some say this is theory is the mathematical quotient for God...Still others say that in proving it, we disprove God)

Most interesting interpretation I've seen lately (outside of string theory, which I find to be a convoluted bunch of physics, with little relevance to the human condition or conscience:

"We have been brought up to experience ourselves as isolated centers of awareness and action; placed in a world that is not us...that is foreign, alien, other, which we confront. Whereas, in fact, the way an ecologist describes human behavior, is as an action. What you do, is what the whole universe is doing at the place you call here and now. You are something the whole universe is doing, in the same way that a wave is something the whole ocean is doing. This is not what you might call a fatalistic or deterministic idea. You see, you might be a fatalist if you think you are a sort of puppet which life pushes around--you are separate from life, but life dominates you. That is fatalism."

What does this mean to you? What does this mean for anyone...for me? What does this mean for the way of life humans have adopted? How much of life is imagined or invented by human consciousness? Hmmmmm

womb-man

2005-03-13T20:26:00.000-06:00

Currently Playing
Oceanic
By Isis
see related

Update, you say? I think I will.

This time, an analysis of what separates men from women.

Men:
Men are direct. Men are upfront. Men are incomplete. Men are typcially short-sighted, or, if long-range, they have lofty goals that are usually based on fantasy. Men seek the achievable, the day-to-day doable. They want results that are quantifiable. They seek concrete results. Men seldom hide emotions behind facades. Men like the mechanics of the daily operation of life.

Women:
Women are indirect, except when they feel grossly overwhelmed by the directness of men. Women are behind, back-alley, black market dealers...far from upfront. They circumvent and plan and predispose and strategize. Women are complete, but often lack the desire to open all the doors, because "all the doors" comes with a lot of hassle that they don't feel they need. Women are long-range planners, but they often forget to take care of the esoteric details that mark the lanes of progress in life...the big picture tends to obscure all else for them. Women seek the unobtainable, the imagined, the obtuse, and the ideal. Women, because of this, are hopelessly lost in the world of applications that usually makes up the mind of men. They see this backdrop as "unsubstantial." Women seek results that are quantifiable, but only on their unforeseen and indescribable scale of achievement. Women crave substance, which for men, often means sharing feelings...men don't like that. Women have so many fronts that a man will be lucky if he sees the second half of the game...

That said...(as if you all didn't already know these things)...women are wonderful, and if they weren't, why would men bother? I suppose the "vice versa" rule should be in effect on this one. Why would women bother?

If you need additional insights, refer to Matt Ridley's book "The Red Queen" which discusses in detail the evolution of sex and gender differences in humans and other species.

2005-03-01T00:22:00.000-06:00

Currently Playing
Oceanic
By Isis
see related

I have supposed too much, and I suppose that is the problem. I have suppose that truth is truth and that false is false. I have supposed that my alterior motives are valid and those of others are the "scurf of yesterday's emotions."

I suppose that simplicity, in plan, is great...but in practice it blows.

I suppose that I (and perhaps my thought processes) am too good for myself and this assumption of simplicity.

How about complicity? Complacency?

Maybe that is the door that needs openining.

Whatever it is, it has to become more simple. Otherwise...it will utterly fail.

You remember that time in "The Shining" right before Jack went crazy?...Yeah? I feel like that. Let's analyze Jack's mental state:

1) Unfulfilled personal potential--this was based on societal pressures competing with a sense of self worth and expectation (somewhat deserved...)

2) Inability to express himself in a way that was true, yet accomodating to those around him.

3) The desire to be a provider, yet the inability to control (and therefore fully satisfy within a system of inequalities) the needs of those attached to him.

4) The need to feel accomplishment within the confines of his position...yet the overwhelming desire to achieve more than "the common man" does for "the common good."

Hmmmm...I think Jack has someting going for him on this one.

On another note...

I will echo QC Metal and say that this is one bad mofo...

DANCE!!!!

Homeless on the Island

2005-02-20T21:06:00.000-06:00

Well, today I went to Sillvan Island, along with some of the science club members.

We met the homeless man of sillvan Island. He sat, head down in the rain...red, bushy beard protruding from his jacket.

I said "how you doin?" as we side-stepped him.

My friend Devin from the QC Brew and View told me about him this summer. We both ride a lot, and during one of his expeditions he happened upon the Homeless Man of the Island. They talked. They exchanged data about the current times and happenings. The Homeless One told Devin about all the conspiracies that threatened to topple us as a citizenry.

I should have stopped to talk. I should have stopped to offer...something.

I sat tonight in front of my TV, with a cup of hot tea and a snort of 12 year old scotch and thought about it all. What does this man do when he gets sick? When he is f&%#ing tired of sitting in the rain and 36 degree weather, what does he do? When he is hungry, what does he do? I am no spring chicken, and I have been around a while. I've seen a few things, but this made me think about my situation vs. his. Is it due to social selection? Is it pure chance? Why am I so fortunate? What if fate had twisted its face differently?

All I know is this. No matter how hard things are...no matter how many GD complaints I have...my life is pretty good. I know that somewhere, someone has a life much harder than mine.

I know that I am entitled to whatever I can grasp (hypothetically). But am I really entitled? What about everyone else? What a system we have.

2005-01-30T20:26:00.000-06:00

xanga, die...
well, um, but,
snuh

So, I reiterate my previous disgust and amazement concerning the human race. Unbelievable. I know that when I was in HS, you would not have heard a story about a 16 year old chopping up another 16 year old. You may have heard a story about some random, drug-related, violence...stemming from a mob-mentality and fueled by some reefer and a 9mm, but that was about it.
This is soulless...this is totally comprehensible...I get it. I see it. I've seen it before in the press and on TV, but that was adults.
This situation...it has reminded me...We have succeeded in producing the most quickly jaded, implacable, remoreseless, desensitized, violent, misanthropic, directionless, apathetic teenage generation yet. These are the children of the original 'ME' generation. Selfish parents raising repressed, angry, heartless, lonely, unloved, burden-of-the-world kids. Parents who instead of being there, instead of being a parent, settle for "friend." Parents who find it too challenging to mentor and monitor and exemplify. Parents who are seen as fuck-ups by their own children. Parents who settle for placating with materialism and drugs and booze...for themselves and their kids. Parents who are on their 3rd marriage and stuffing a 20 into their teen's hands and telling them to "get lost" and "go someplace" so they can fuck Mrs. Somebody Else's EX from down the block in private. How can I say such things with unabashed certainty? I've watched this show for the past 12 years in person...it's great.
So, here is to the easiest path, the way to pleasure and numbness, the quick solution, the clueless guidance, and the piss-poor world...and fuck-all.

OH, and p.s....I am happy to say that the Quad City Juggalos made it out to the mourning session for Ms. Reynolds. God bless the insane clown possee fans...we rely on their heartstrong members and their morally upright guidance (spawned from the inspired lyrics of the ICP duo themselves) to get us through troubling times and remind us that we are, indeed, human.

Human race?...

2005-01-17T21:51:00.000-06:00

I spent a lot of time this weekend thinking about what a biological success and anomaly the human species is. Everywhere I look there are so many things I find inspiring about our existance, and then again, so many things that are horrifying and utterly defy logic.
How the hell did we make it this far this fast? I mean, if you are a student of the biological discipline (as I am)...how do we explain this? We have "evolved" much faster than any other species that we have evidence of. (bad to end on preposition...)We are far more intelligent (judging by our use of language and technology and our self-awareness). I mean, we can think about why we think about things...for cryin out loud! That is impressive. No other species is as adaptable. No other species is as prone to self (and other) destruction. I mean, we really are hell-bent on destruction and our own demise...look at our planet...AND we're not content with that. We are taking more than 50% of the other species with us in some sort of whole-sale "f!*@ off" to the rest of the planet.

I suppose what I find even more amazing is the lack of humility, other-awareness, or grace that should come with that kind of responsibility. The entire human race is very self-absorbed. In essence, when I see the majority rule of "me first," I start to panic. Is that all that comes of the kind of mental capacity we have? That amazing brain we have? Are we so oblivious as to our own demise and that of our planet?

I tried to find the negative argument to this...that we are full of potential and promise and hope...but I couldn't...I mean, I haven't...at least not for the past 30 years. The human race has achieved great beauty; I see this in specific examples: mostly art and a few exceptional humanitarians...I tried to look for wholesale examples of selflessness and sacrifice and humility and awareness and grace and...didn't find them.

Maybe that is the only rational argument for a higher power. Maybe that is the only argument for belief in something so complex, and yet so simple as a being to lord over this wayward species...something/someone benevolent enough to forgive this anomalous species and give it a chance to realize what it has done (because, certainly nature itself is never this forgiving of blatant ineptitude). Is that "sartori" like the ancient buddhist monks achieved? Is enlightment/salvation realizing one's true place and one's true nature? Is it coming to terms with the inherent fallability of the human race, accepting it, reforming the self-concept, and continuing to live?

I have no idea...but I know that most people bug the hell out of me...Our lack of vision and understanding...if the world ends tomorrow, I'll not be bitter.

Just Started Out...

2005-01-10T15:53:00.000-06:00

So here is yet another blog...I joined because it seems to be a little less convoluted than my other(xanga), and, so far, this doesn't seem to be used by "the kids."

Primarily I was inspired by some of the posts I've read here...Seems like decent place to spend a quiet night with my thoughts....

So first entry is a test.

We'll see...